


it is all we have got

by lilabut



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Light Angst, Mild Gore, post season two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-07
Packaged: 2018-05-18 21:02:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5942986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilabut/pseuds/lilabut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: Daryl and Carol are separated from the rest of the group after the fall of the farm. They form an unlikely partnership, and when one close call hits too close to home, things change.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it is all we have got

 

_I'm holding on to you, holding on to me  
Maybe it's all gone black but you're all I see _

 

_All I Need_ , Mat Kearney

 

It is an odd partnership they have formed over the winter. They depend on each other more than they both would like, and in ways neither of them would have expected.

 

Some nights, she still wonders about the fate of the others, what had happened to them after the farm had gone down in flames. Now, after months have passed slowly and painfully, the thoughts do not bring tears anymore. Those nights are rare now, and usually the warmth of Daryl's body pressing into her back, his arms stretched out protectively over her own, the steadiness of his breathing against her neck, it is enough to ease the constant tension in her body and erase all dreadful thoughts for a short while.

 

Daryl is as much a mystery to her as he has been from the first day at the quarry camp. He somehow manages to remain just that, while his every shy movement and each word he does not say are presented to her like an open book, a mirror that she catches herself staring into too often and for too long.

 

Under his watchful eyes and guiding hands, she has become quite capable, the sight of a Walker no longer petrifying her. Skillful with her knife, Carol ever so often feels pride gleaming inside of her, and whenever she catches Daryl's gaze in those moments, she almost believes that she can spot it mirrored in his eyes.

 

 

 

They have had many close calls during their months of solitude, but never quite as close as this. Carol can still feel the Walker's decomposing, brittle fingers around her neck, the stench of death and rotting flesh clinging to her like a second skin.

 

Her breath is labored, still, as she struggles to keep up with Daryl. He sets a relentless pace, and has not spoken a single word since they had to flee their meager shelter after the small herd had come through.

 

_Daryl, what's going on?_ she asks eventually, careful not to speak too loudly as they march briskly along the empty road. Her unexpected words stop him in his tracks, and when he finally turns to meet her confused gaze, the tears in his eyes make her gasp.

 

_You almost died!_ His shout breaks through the silence, and Carol suppresses the urge to tell him to keep quiet. Instead, she takes a tentative step towards him, remembering all too well the last time he had projected his anger at her like this.

 

( _you're afraid cause you're all alone!_ )

 

_I'm not dead, Daryl._ Her voice is soft, reassuring, no matter how much she struggles to keep her own tears at bay.

 

_That would've been on me._ Daryl continues, suddenly looking right through her, and once again she can see everything that he can not allow himself to say. _I should've-_

 

_Stop_ , she interrupts him, raising her voice. _This isn't on you. None of it is._ It is not his fault that the others abandoned them that night, nor that he could not track them down afterward. The ache in her bones and the shiver when he holds her close at night, the constant hunger, none of that is to be blamed on him. And yet, he does, and with so much self-hatred that it threatens to tear them apart. _I'm not dead,_ she whispers, suddenly right in front of him, so close she can see the despair in his lonely eyes. _You're not alone._

 

He wants to speak up, defend himself, most likely tell her how much better he is on his own.

 

She kisses him, then. Not because this is the right moment, or even the right thing to do. She kisses him because now more than ever, she realizes that this might be her last chance to do it.

 

He freezes against her, and for a moment she feels the sting of rejection blossoming in her chest. It hurts more than she anticipated. When she pulls back, though, his hands come up quickly to frame her face, calloused palms cold against her flushed skin. Still, he does not move, looks almost frightened, and it is mirrored in the way he touches her with trembling fingers.

 

_You're not alone, anymore,_ Carol repeats softly and with a smile that she can feel tugging at her heart. She closes the distance then, allows him to feel the stretch of her lips against his own. When he responds eagerly, she, too, finally stops feeling like she is all alone.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by _All I Need_ by Mat Kearney. The title is also taken from that song.


End file.
